Day 106 - to conclude... I think.

OK, I think this it guys.

Wow!

It's taken 80 posts, 106ish days, a boatload of manifestation and a serious amount of soul searching. 5 mind expansion / life coaching courses, dozens of conversations with my shrink / coach, 3 family arguments, the end of a love affair, one Peruvian hallucinogenic, 2 one night stands, 2 new people, 4 'cooled' friendships, yoga, chi gung... And around 85% abstinence if I am correct.

All this yielded, as far as I can work out, 9 hardcore 'awakenings' or 'realisations'.

I say 'all'. By realisations, what I mean is things that I have now accepted as absolute fact. Things to hold close and abide by for the rest of my life.

So I guess this is where I should start, in order to conclude this leg of my journey properly.

Realisation no.1: I am Neo

We can all be Neo. If we manage to escape the matrix and engage in real life, we instantly become unstoppable and are filled with all the power in the universe. Our purpose becomes clear (to serve and help others), our minds open up to possibility and opportunity and our previously 'projected' future manifests in the present as a part of every day life. Playing small is a thing of the past. Anything is possible.

Footnote: All you need to do to escape the matrix is decide to do it. Focus on doing it. And just do it. It may happen over a period of small steps, or it may happen immediately. You may get up from your chair, leaving your suit jacket draped over it, walk past your colleagues to the front door of the office, and walk straight out of the building, never to return, right into the terror, vitality and lusciousness of real life. Or you may slowly ease out over the course of a year, paving the path you leave for others to follow. Either way, here's a tip: you'll never be truly happy until you've done it.

Breakthough no.2: The meaning of meaning (the meaning of life)

Life is whatever we want it to be. Fact. We can attach meaning to whatever we wish. Make your life mean something shitty and and you'll have a shitty life. Don't accept your education as fact - rather, reject it all and re-build via intuition - according to our own beliefs and values (nb: intuition: tuition from within: all the answers lie within you). Nothing means anything universally - and 99.9% of things are totally meaningless. BUT: some things come close to meaning something, and my re-built beliefs and values are telling me to fill my life with this stuff. The following things are close to having meaning, and certainly mean something to me: Contribution. Love. Commitment. Kindness. Happiness. Wellbeing. Integrity. Authenticity. These things mean something to me. But nothing is universally important or universally meaningful. Once I realised that, my whole being seemed so much... Lighter.

Breakthough no.3: The futility of desire

Rather like learning a new language, we may know what a word means before we truly understand it. I now understand desire as a massive waste of time and energy. It is so tiring to strive for and want all the time. I have also realised that being here, now, is the only way to achieve an abundant life. If we are always aiming for what you desire, it will remain exactly that - a desire. By aiming for our desires, you will miss completely how to get there. As my desire fades, my life grows richer and richer.

Realisation no.4: The benefits of stillness.

'Be still. Wait for the mud to settle. remain still until it is time to act.' Lao Tzu.

I now recognise this year and this journey I have taken purely as 'stillness'. Much as I have been physically still for much of this time, via yoga and meditation and just 'being', what I have really done is dis-engage myself from my former life, hit the pause button and given myself time to grow, learn and change. I don't think too strong a word for my process is 'transformation'. And I realise that I could never have done this without giving myself time to be still. To let the world pass me by for a moment. Being still gives me the time to read, absorb, think, listen, wait , stretch, breathe and just be. If you are procrastinating over whether to take time out, let me help you - press the pause button on your life. And only restart when you are good and ready. You may find it dramatically different.

Realisation no.5: Be religious about Mother Nature

I feel deeply connected to nature now. Our roll in the environment is clear to me, as is my own contribution. We, humans I mean, are just guests here. Mother nature is alive and talking to us. It's about time we listened. But even more than this, I also appreciate the value of life - that every living thing on this planet is equal and should be treated as such. This has instilled in me a feeling of gratitude and awareness for all that I consume and a deep conscience about my own footprint. I am even considering buying a Prius.

Realisation no.6: The effectiveness of authenticity

It's ironic, but as soon as I dropped my long standing inauthenticity, my entire life opened up. I did this by simply acknowledging, in front of 100 or so people, how inauthentic I was. The very moment I did this, an extraordinary sequence of events unravelled that resulted in me being in the wonderful clearing I no find myself. Great people appeared to help me - completely attracted by previously masked weaknesses. Work blossomed - ideas manifesting into the path I now see so clearly before me. And peace of mind flowed - in the knowledge that I was no longer lying to the world. Authenticity delivers so much else to your life as well. Integrity. Honesty. Resolve. And it made me realise one key thing: Indifference, or laziness, is a crime against humanity, and is the single biggest danger in the world today.

Realisation no.7: Go with the flow

'Flow around obstacles, not through them.' Lao Tzu.

Like the river of life in Herman Hesse's Siddhartha, the stream of our existence will descend in the only way it can - by sliding smoothly past the rocks and the boulders. We must do the same. In the same way as all rivers end up in the ocean, all humans end up dead. The only reason we step out of flow is to obtain something unimportant before death inevitably occurs. So what's the point? We are born with nothing and we die with nothing. Have stuff, for sure. But don’t make it mean something. That’s the path to unhappiness. We pay for pleasure, but we can’t buy happiness. Accept that your own river of life is as perfect and wonderful as anything in Mother Nature's scrapbook and get on with whatever your purpose is.

Footnote: For the opposite of flow, I think extremism fits. Flow is about acceptance and feeling fine and not forcing or striving. Extremism is all about forcing things to happen - trying to swim against the flow of the river, or even turn the flow around. Extremism leads to problems, balance leads to progress. It's not the religions of this world that cause problems. It's the religious extremists. And it's not the western countries that over react to the extremists, it's the extremist leaders of those countries.

Realisation no.8: Live in the day, for the day

'We're all dyin'. Act accordingly.' Jack Nicholson, The Departed.

I couldn't really put it much better than that. the importance of being in the present moment is just unfathomably huge. It has become abundantly clear to me that to focus on what is really important to me, I need to be in touch with the fact that I may not be here tomorrow. Every morning, I ask myself: 'If this was the last day of my life, would I do what I am about to do today?' If the answer is 'Yes', then rock'n'roll. If its 'No' for too many days in a row, then something needs changing. I call this process 'Mortalising'. Mortalise every day and ensure your actions remain correspondent with your answers, and watch life improve. I think this is what Steve jobs meant, in one of my favourite speeches to Stanford University, when he said: 'Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish.'

So what happens next? Well, having taken my time out, having pressed the pause button on my life - I have realised what I am supposed to be doing.

It came in a flash of inspiration and it's called Cycle 4, and this blog is not particularly concerned with what that is or how it works.

I can, however, let you in on one thing about Cycle 4:

Realisation no.9: It's all about other people.

The only other thing that needs to be said is that this blog has worked impeccably. Although the subtitle for Manifesting Jack aimed to see my book published, the real purpose of the blog was to manifest my future.

And in chronicling my journey to this point I believe passionately that is has done exactly that.

I am pressing the start button again.

Peace, and love, and thank you for reading.

Writing time: 4 hours

Manifestation: 100%