Not a good weekend for manifestation.
The law of attraction dictates that only positive thoughts will result in manifestation of book deal and publisher by my 30th birthday.
And sadly, the weekend was full of fear and doubt.
There is nothing like a hangover to instil an inate fear of failure about a new project.
The end of the week was overwhelmingly positive. I seem to have manifested around 5 introductions to publishers regards How To Survive Your Twenties. Another friend knows a leading book designer. Another is facilitating an introduction to a top agent. Also, best friend seems to really believe in the project. One of them, anyway.
Yet although all these positive things are happening, I am living in a state of exhaustion which is stopping me producing my best work. I can't sleep in my flat cause it is too noisy. My re mortgage is taking so long I am out of pocket for thousands. My house sale seems to be falling through. My nerves seem shredded by life.
I live my life in recovery. Recovery from one thing or another.
I must produce better work. I must think, feel and believe in better work.
Maybe I should leave london to complete the project... I fear never truly conquering the demons of friendship and tribal pull.
The pressures of being a 20something!
I am looking froward to Day 11. Better this time draws to a close.
Writing time: virtually zero
Manifestation: ditto
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